By Tracy Sekhon
We all do it. I wish we didn’t, but we do. We read something or hear something and, especially during times like these, we form our own opinion about what that “thing” means. We judge. And, we do so without any details or explanations, we just decide that we should make our voice heard about what’s “right” and “wrong”, as we see it.
I have been reading a lot of comments about others’ decisions regarding the current stay at home orders. And, while I don’t believe that they come from a bad place, I don’t feel that much consideration is being given to the circumstances that exist, that are likely not known or understood.
-the mother who takes her small children with her to the grocery store, is doing so because there is not enough food in the house and she’s a single mother, who has no one to care for her children while she shops. Should she leave them at home alone? Of course not.
-the hairdresser who is still cutting hair in her garage, while wearing a mask and gloves, is doing so because it’s her only income and that’s the only way to put food on the table for her family? Should they go hungry? I wouldn’t let them.
-the woman who desperately tries to find someone to fill her nails, does so because her natural nails have always been so thin, that they peel off, leaving her fingers so exposed, that it’s painful to type or write, to cook for her family, clean her home or do her job? This is me…and I can tell you that pain is a great motivator for breaking “the rules”.
-the parents that allow (essential) therapists in their home, even during these times, do so because they have a child that so desperately needs behavioral support, that they’re willing to take that risk to save their child and family from destruction.
You see, there are many reasons that we don’t know, as to why others make the decisions and take the risks that they do. What if…we trusted them to make the very best decision that they can, considering their own circumstances, and stop assuming that they’re imposing this risk upon us? Why can’t we assume that they are just as desperate for solutions as we are, and offer them trust, empathy and compassion, as opposed to judgement?
I dare you to try it.